Okay, so as I mentioned the other day, Alpha Dad thinks he’s really clever for spelling words that he doesn’t want me to hear. I’ll admit, when he started calling the Park “P-A-R-K” and referring to the walk as “W-A-L-K,” I was pretty confused. But Basset Hounds are scholarly (even though we don’t look it), so now I know to look forward to my W-A-L-K every evening.
When I’m happy to be going on a W-A-L-K, I take off down the sidewalk at a trot. This is just a little faster than a walk.
Sometimes, I get really really excited about going on a W-A-L-K! Like the summer when there were cicadas everywhere and life was like an endless snacktime. Or maybe there’s a wabbit in the neighbor’s yard (look out wabbits, here I come!) For this reason, I like to call my second-fastest speed rabbit run.
You might think that Basset Hounds are always slow and lazy, but the truth is that we’re only slow and lazy when we want to be… which means we’re almost always slow and lazy. But on rare occasions (like when I smell a pretty Lady Hound across the street), I like to show off a speed that I call bullet dog. Basset Hounds have a very aerodynamic shape (with the exception of our ears, of course), and when I get caught up in the scent of the neighbor’s barbecue, there is no stopping this Hound.
Like I said, it’s rare that I ever pull off “bullet dog.” The speed that I use more than all of the aforementioned is a speed that is best described as no go. That’s when I park my butt on the sidewalk and say “Alpha Dad, I do not want to go to the vet, and I am going to sit here and refuse to move until you give up and take me home.”
You’ve heard it here, from Sheriff Bluepaw. Alpha Dad may think he knows everything, but he’s underestimating the Assistant Protector of Bagels Everywhere if he thinks I don’t have a few tricks of my own.